Annoyed... Yes, I too get That Way!

I'm annoyed. It's nobody's fault but I'm just annoyed. Annoyed at the fact I haven't had genuine time for myself and annoyed that by the time I do have time for myself I'm too tired to do a gosh darn thing. ....in this moment in time I'm suffering from what I call 'growing pains.'

I get them every so often-like every six months. I feel bad when I get annoyed and I feel like a bad parent. I love my kids- I really, really do! I dreamt of having days with them in my life. I just thought there would be a little bit of  time for me too. 

Tonight I would love to do something for me, but with my type-a personality all I can think of is everything that needs to get done for tomorrow and next week-darn it! I just realized I didn't pick out clothes for church! That's hard to do in the dark! I am mentally busy all of the time. I'm prepping and then planning. So for example I'm thinking what will tomorrow be like at church. What is plan A,B, and C for the hour we are there. Snacks-I need to pack them. Probably a change of clothes-I'd hate to have half dressed kids at church! The camera and battery and oh, some sort of bag that I can pack everything in that kinda matches my outfit? My clothes-ugh what am I going to wear. 

I have to be honest. We've not been to church in a long time. First I was worried about germs because they were premeies, then it was flu season (I've got to get my flu shot!), then the kids weren't interested in sitting but not durable enough-in my opinion, to go and play witht the rest of the kids. Then it was flu season again...I'm sure you get the idea.  

 My niece is being baptized and of course we don't want to miss it. Taking the kids to church is exhausting to me. There is so much prepping and planning because of my personality and it just wears me out. I'm doing it every other day of the week and we just have not gone. It's bad. I know that. We used to go all the time and were very active. I know I need fed spiritually... I'm praying about it.  I'm really hoping tomorrow goes smoothly. 

Well the kiddos are asleep and I really need to go figure out what the game plan is for tomorrow so I can try and relax....thank you for reading. I'm actually feeling a little bit better! 

Trying to Keep Calm...

Xoxoxox

Danielle 

****so after writing this, I came down to everything done...I think God had a quick chat with the hubby:-) love them both! Time for wine and a fire!