{The Peaks and Pits of Parenthood}

There is nothing like sleeping in....okay lets be honest. Sleeping in for us parents means 6:30 or 7:00 if we're lucky.  This morning getting to sleep in until 6:40 felt so amazing after a week of interrupted sleep.  The perfect storm arrived at our house early Tuesday morning. My son entered our room and came to the foot of our bed. As he climbed up the bed to my feet he announced his tummy hurt which was followed by last nights dinner all over my legs. 

 Unfortunately that event sent my husband running to the bathroom- he had gone to bed not feeling well. After getting sheets changed and my son back to bed we laid down for what felt a short time before my daughter started yelling, "Mommy I peed my bed!"  

Becoming a parent effects our lives as a whole. Every waking moment looks different, feels different, and is forever changed by these amazing little gifts we call our children.  Areas that were once uneventful, like waking up, become the headline for our day.  One thing parenthood has taught me is never stop expecting the unexpected.

Does that mean the unexpected events are always going to end up in exhaustion? Not always. Today my kids crawled into bed with me in the middle. I dozed back to sleep and shortly there after was awoken by them counting together in Hebrew. It was an amazing sound of growth and a demonstration of their love of learning-what every good teacher hopes to instill in their students. 

Reflecting on the highs and lows, or peaks and pits, of our days as parents is a way for us  to appreciate the parenting process and helps us to see what may even be the smallest milestone in not only our child's life but in ours.

I hope you will follow me in a new adventure...I want ALL parents to find  BLISS in their parenting experience. I want parents to just B Blissful. Over the next couple of weeks I'll be working hard to on rolling out my new website: www.bblissful.com where I'll continue to discuss the peaks and pits of parenting in all aspects of our parenting lives. I'm always looking for ways to collaborate...if you have a fun idea you would like to share you can email me at info@bblissful.com.  

xoxo
Danielle 

{Mommy-tude]

Have you ever watched the show Black List?  After getting rid of cable at the beginning of the year, my husband and I have been running through different series and we stumbled upon this show and have managed to watch quiet a few episodes this weekend which has kept up way past our own bedtimes.

If you've seen this show before, you know the story line can be incredibly intense and disturbing. Going to bed after three intense episodes was less than easy last night. So in order to take my mind of things I started to think about upcoming events, projects, meetings, holidays, birthdays etc...At this point I'm trying the "bore myself to sleep" tactic.

I ended up thinking about March of Dimes since it's fast approaching which then quickly took me back three years. It's really bizarre how I can begin reliving a situation and time that is now clearly well behind me. Three years ago, I would have been recovering from having been sent to labor and delivery for the first time-yes we didn't just go once...we went twice. I remember trying to stay strong and make the call to Aaron that I was in labor, but I couldn't do it without crying. There were at least six people in the room at the time and the one nurse, Brittney, said she would make the call for me.

 Once my family was all  there, I remember how we were taking pictures before delivery smiling, you know trying to make this whole situation as normal and "picture perfect" as can be. While it was still too early for these babies to come, we couldn't help but feel lucky we had made it five more weeks. We knew as soon as the babies were born they would be in the NICU and we would have a new life to adjust to. We had been so hopeful and we were thankful for what time we had gained. Laying in bed though last night, I was panicked thinking about the events leading up to going to the delivery room that day. I remember the people, the doctors, and while I was oddly relaxed three years ago, my heart was racing lying in bed....

Our first trip to labor and delivery at 29 weeks

After somehow managing to fall asleep last night, I woke up this morning with the kiddos wrapped all around my body getting morning snuggles. We headed down stairs, fed the dog, got snacks, and my oh so important cup of coffee. I sat down to do a little social media surfing and saw my "timehop." Here is what it said:

"3 years ago... I know it's because I'm in a rare situation and I'm extremely sensitive, but I find it really annoying when people wish their pregnancy away when we're just praying for one more day of development so our children don't have to be in the NICU any longer than they have to...Just enjoy it! I'm off my sensitive soap box now."

At this point, three years ago, my labor somehow stopped and I was back on the special care floor at Good Sam.  My body was wrecked for being on a delivery table for two days and I could hardly stand to walk or take a shower. My first round of "delivery" took a toll on me and at this point I was frustrated people could complain about something I was praying so hard for.

I had a friend tell me not too long ago that there will always be people who have more than you and always people who will have less....My addition to this would be there is always someone who is experiencing a hardship worse than yours and someone who is "living the life." We sit on one end of these scales at some point in our life. Sometimes we have it all and sometimes we feel like we're loosing it all. There are times when tragedy strikes and we're thrown down into the darkest of days, and then there are times where we are high on life-nothing but blue skies.

Three years ago I knew my situation could have been worse...One day I was headed to my weekly Friday morning appointment "out" (which was actually only down a couple of floors) and the girl I usually see in the morning wasn't there lined up across from me in her wheel chair. She had come into the hospital a few weeks after me at 24 weeks. I watched her husband comfort her many times and I could read the pain and fear on her face.  My first thought was panicked but then thought maybe there was a scheduling issue. I got a good checkup that Friday and as I w as being pushed in my wheel chair to the elevator, I saw the woman I had been wondering about. She wasn't in a wheel chair any more and her tummy was no longer in the shape of a small basketball. She had delivered a very young and weak baby who was now in the NICU and would be for a very long time....We spoke very briefly that day.....This is when I learned that  there is always someone who is having a harder time.

So what's my point to all of this you may be wondering? As moms, we go through life changing events and now that we have children who are observing how we react or handle situations. Our attitude, reactions, words, and body language speak volumes to these little people who are trying to decipher the world around them.   They are learning how to react to situations and they are learning it straight from us.  Our "mommy-tudes" are life changing right now and it's important we demonstrate attitudes and behaviors that we want our children to learn from.

As a mom, before my kids were even born, I had to have a positive attitude. I knew added worry and stress could effect them-even though they were in my belly. The only voices they heard were me, the nurses, doctors and of course family and friends when they would come visit. Every day I was asked at least a dozen times if not more "how are you? how are you feeling?" Being asked this question so many times a day, I had a choice of whether my children were going to hear a doom and gloom story every single time or if they were going to hear a confident happy mom.  I chose for my children to hear happiness in their mother's voice-NOT worry.

As a mom now,  I don't hide my emotions from my children. When I'm sad, I show them it's okay to cry and that it takes time to heal. When I'm upset, I try my hardest to not get too loud and to use words that are productive and apart of a solution-not an addition to the problem.  I want my children to learn how to manage their feelings when they are sad, angry, happy, and scared. I want to be supportive and at the end of whatever emotional rollercoaster they have been on, I want them to know that while their situation was tough, there are others who are suffering greater tragedies whom we should pray for...leading them in the direction of being grateful for the life God has blessed them with. At the end of the day, our greatest tragedies don't out weigh our gift of life we still have to live and share with others. God only hands us what we can handle.

What is your "mommy-tude" around your children? Do you fly off the handle at something little (we all do it from time to time) or do you let it roll? When you've had a crummy day at work, do you leave it at work or bring it home? When you are upset do you lash out or find a calmer way to resolve the situation? We can't be happy all of the time. Life isn't perfect. We are destined to have a million ups and downs but the most important thing is how our children are seeing us handle the difficult steep hills and how we climb out of the valley ready to climb up the next hill. Our mommy-tudes are powerful and our perspective on life events are shaping how our children will react to future life events....lets do our children a favor and work really hard at passing on a positive impact on their emotional health.   (Gosh our job as mom is hard!!!)

I hope you've had an awesome weekend!! If you're on Spring break, I hope you're enjoying it!! If you're soon to be on Spring break I hope it will be relaxing to some extent...and if Spring break means nothing to you at this point in your parenting life-I hope you are enjoying the longer brighter days!

{Why I Don't Have a Desk}

Before kids, I used a desk and up until this past December I had one I never used. It was actually more of a safety hazard because the one drawer it had was more or less a catch all. The layer of dust and random objects thrown upon it left it looking like an eye sore...so away it went.

I had a delimia though. Where was I going to keep stamps, pens, envelopes, coupons etc. that was convienient for when I needed to pay a few bills. I'm not sure about you, but my kitchen drawers are full-they probably could be de cluttered but who wants to take up valuable kitchen space with office supplies? Plus I needed a quick fix! 

My girlfriend sent me an awesome Thirty-One gift that has fixed my problems and I was able to store things out of sight by hanging it behind the basement door-but centrally located! 

At this point in time it's not the most presentable but hey, this is real life not a Thirty-One catalog picture!  For the past three months this has worked as a perfect out of sight office for me! It's durable and I love how I can label the pockets (that are actually really deep!). 

With this working so beautifully, I decided to take one of the kids organizers they received for traveling and try using it for the millions of markers, crayons, paints, screw drivers and batteries that have been rolling around. 

This has become grand central station for the twins' supplies and its out of reach! This is stored on the inside of our basement door-again centrally located and not taking up valuable drawer space that they would likely get into! Nobody needs paint or markers on the walls!

How do keep organized?! I'd love to know! Please post your clever ways to share with me and other mommas!

{I Need Back Up}

There is nothing like coming home from work on a warm day, throwing on comfy clothes, grabbing a cold drink and sitting on the patio to catch some Spring rays.  Peace. And. Quiet. The sounds of nature were alomst defening but relaxing at the same time. It was AMAZING...But don't you know all good things come to an end and this time things were ending with a call for back-up. 

It was my afternoon off from picking up the kids. With the weather being so amazingly nice, I wrapped things up quickly at work so I could get home to have a few minutes to myself. I know that sounds  entirely selfish, I have plenty of mommy guilt when I do things like this (will that ever go away?!), but sometimes us moms just need time to do ordinary things, like go to the bathroom and change clothes, ALONE.  And anyways, Aaron and the kids were going to be home in about twenty minutes-not like it was that much "me" time...

 As I was baking in the last bit of sun peeking over the roof of our house, Aaron called. I figured he was calling to say hi and to see when I would be home-I never tell anyone if I'm taking "me"time- but the phone call was not the usual, it was a call for back-up and lucky for all involved I was home to help. Landen had gotten sick in the car and from what I heard from Caroline it was a  "stinky" ride. I threw my drink in the fridge, grabbed cleaner and a plastic grocerybag from our growing collection (I don't know what I would do without those grocery bags!) and I headed out to the driveway.  As they pulled up I looked for Landen and boy was it a sight.  It was so bad Aaron unhooked the carseat with Landen still in it, in hopes he could contain everything.  What a fun night we had ahead of us. Aaron and I each spent a good hour in the clean up process.

Have you ever had to call in back up? What type of disasterous momments have you had? Ever since the twins were born, I have found myself calling on someone for help daily.  If I didn't have the help of others, I would probablly-strike that- I WOULD be pulling out my hair out and chasing my tail the majority of my mommy days! My husband, family, friends, neighbors, and co-workers are amazing. I am in debt to many people! 

The night was restless..the twins would have worn out a call button if they had one.. After three cups of coffee I'm struggling to stay awake...nap time can't get here soon enough!!  

Have an AWESOME day! 

Xoxoxo

{Sharing Sibling Pain}

I've often been asked in the past if Landen and Caroline have a unique twin realationship.  When they were small they had their own language, but that I felt was developmental not really special because they were twins or anything.  Is Caroline extremely protective of Landen and Landen the same of Caroline? Now a days yes. At bed time, if Landen won't stay in his bed his consequence is the loss of one of the million stuffed animals in his bed. Caroline gets so worried for Landen and will insist desperately for me to give Landen's precious toy back.

Today, something interesting happened.  Landen was complaining his right ear hurting . He kept poking at it and said he needed the Dr.  What child volunteers to visit the Dr. who in the past has only dished out not one but two shots? Landen had an ear infection about a month ago. I had no idea because he had other things going on as well and when I did take him in for another symptom, I found out he had not one but two ear infections. Poor guy! He never complained! 

So today, being more alert, I said, "I'll call the Dr. office and get you an appointment." Sure enough they could take us first thing so it wouldn't disrupt our day. So Landen checked out with a good bill of health. They did a thorough check and said it was the tiniest bit red but nothing to worry about at his point. Fine. 

This afternoon, the nurse at school informs me that Caroline saw her and said with a smile, "My ear hurts."  I probably rolled my eyes because it's so like her to pretend she is hurt or not feeling well for a little extra attention. So the story goes on...the nurse kindly checks her ears and sure enough SHE is the the one WITH the ear infection. My  mom radar must not be working! I was so surprised to hear she had an infection because Caroline is a little more verbal than Landen is so I'm surprised she hadn't said anything sooner. 

I've now learned just to take them both to the Dr. to have them checked. When will I learn it's always double the fun when it comes to being  sick. Now, was Landen feeling "sympathy" twin pain today or was it just a coincidence? I don't know.  Do they have a special relationship as siblings growing up together? Totally!  Either way, there will never be a dull moment....that is something I am reminded of every day! 

Always expect the unexpected! 

xoxox

{The Black Hole}

Do any of you fellow mommies know where that black hole is?? I'm in need of several things back..to date I'm missing shirts, kids socks, a bra that was riciously expensive, a pink puppy, and a new matchbox truck...the last two being THE most important. 

Landen and Caroline have a crazy collection of things they put in their bed at night and if I hide one under the bed, they know when it's missing. I only wish tonight was one of those nights where I had put one of their precious toys under their bed and I could just pull it out with a very suprising voice saying, "Look what I found!"  Landen asked for his new truck and was certain I would find it in his pillow case or stuck somwhere in his bed.  After a thorough scan through is bed, I went to his top five hiding places. Nothing. Aaron and I hit the floor and all the rooms looking for his truck and nothing turned up.  I reassured Landen I would continue the search while he laid in bed. 

Caroline must have done inventory on her bed while I was conducting the first search with Aaron because as soon as I sat down, she hollered that she was missing her pink puppy...that would have been helpful to know when I was doing my first sweep of the house. Have you ever had a picture in your mind of where you last saw something? I did tonight and I remember her not having it for nap time. I swear the dog was on the couch...but the black hole must have taken it. 

Lucky for me tonight, they happily fell asleep without these very valuable items. But when morning comes it could be an unpretty scene when loading up for Mimi's house. I should probably keep looking...unless someone knows where I can find the balck hole..I'll certainly trade a few things in so I can have a nice morning tomorrow! 

Hoping you had a fabulous weekend!

xoxo

{The Unexpected That's Always Expected}

Hi mommies! You never know what a day or even an evening is going to hold when you have chdren-can I get an amen? Last night Aaron and I sat down on the couch and in typical Friday night fashion I began to fall asleep around 8:30. It felt so good being in my ugly, but oh so comfy, pjs all wrapped up in one of my favorite Wright State blankets I had gotten as a gift from my cousin as a graduation gift-it's like the perfect "soft" now! 

I woke up to Aaron saying he thought Caroline just threw up. I was in a twilight and ran up the stairs. I was greeted by Landen. He was waving his hand and yelling, " sissy choking hurry mommy hurry!" 

Landen is know as "hero" around our house. He has alerted family of possible emergencies and so he was given that nickname by Mimi and now my husband and I. Now, we've been gating Landen and Caroline in their rooms to help deter Landen, mostly, from sleep walking to our bed in the middle of the night.  So when he met me at the stairs he had quickly gotten over the gate to hurry and get help for his "sissy." 

Seeing the sweet and concerned  look on Landen's face was really telling of how much he cares for her. I hope that while he is technically the younger brother-by about 20 minutes, he will continue to be her protector as they grow up. 

If you're wondering about Caroline, she's doing okay today. We were fortunate to change her clothes three times last night as well as her bedding. She handled it like a champ! Every time I kept saying, " could there really be anymore in there?!"

So, was Friday night as we planned? I can honestly say yes. If you're a parent, you're probably NOT surprised by my answer. We know better. We expect something at any time of the day or night...and while we had a lot of that this week, we made it...and my reward is doing nothing but sitting in the sun relaxing during nap time-this too I know can be interrupted but I'll take what I can get!! 

If you have a warm sunny day like we do in Ohio, get out and enjoy it! Maybe even by yourself if you can!! 

Xoxo